“Paw-Tales” l Mar-Apr-2006

A am Attapatu
I am Attapatu Hi there, my name is Attapatu, and don’t ask me if I’m a Sri Lankan cricket player. I’m not, my parents just thought it would be amusing to give me that name… now you understand that my parents are a bit off their rocker, if you know what I mean. I am a 4-year-old Black Lab/German Shepherd mix, but don’t let the Shepherd part fool you. I’m as cute and sweet as any Lab, just a lot bigger. I guess that’s why people always cross the road when they see me walking towards them. What’s up with that? Have you ever heard of someone being mauled by a cute cuddly Labrador, I mean come on! I am treated like a king! I have my own bed, access to all, no leashes and have all the local little girls fawning all over me. What more could a guy ask for? Not to mention the fact that Mom serves me fresh hot chicken meals every night, in fact. I think Dad is getting jealous. But one thing I don’t understand is why they speak to me like a baby. First of all. I’m no puppy. I may be four, but in dog years, I’m 28 years old, that is the same age as my Mom. Wouldn’t you feel stupid speaking like a baby to someone your own age! Secondly, it’s not as if I don’t understand what they are saying. I do, it just works to my advantage to let them keep thinking I don’t… after all, if they knew my secret, they would expect me to listen to them whenever they tell me something. That would be the end of happy pets all over the world! Basically, what I’m saying is if you want a good life, tonnes of love and attention, no need to worry about jobs or bills, and permission to act ignorant… then you need to be a dog in my house! As my Dad likes to sing, “I want to be my dog, but my dog you see, he doesn’t wants to be me…” – Attapatu & Alexandra